From my teen phone sex slut’s heart to yous, I want to wish all my wonderful world-round pervs a Merry Christmas! I started with my own not-too-far-away roots, in Germany.
In German Happy/Merry Christmas is ‘Frohe Weihnachten’. Christmas Day being called “Erste Feiertag” (‘first celebration’) and the 26th December is known as “Zweite Feiertag” (‘second celebration’) and also “Zweiter Weihnachtsfeiertag” which translates as Boxing Day, which doesn’t mean that at all, but whatever haha! It really means switching places like a boss switching places with his secretary. This I just love celebrating, because I can turn around and tell him to suck my fucking dick for a change! It may be rubber and strapped over my pretty little pussy, but I guarantee I’ll still do some damage!
Kwanzaa has seven symbols–mazao (crops), mkeka (mat), kinara (candleholder), muhindi (corn), kikombe cha umoja (unity cup), zawadi (gifts) and mishumaa saba (seven candles)–that are traditionally arranged on a table. Three of the seven candles are red, representing the struggle; three of the candles are green, representing the land and hope for the future; and one of the candles is black, representing people of African descent.
I have a soft spot for this holiday, for several reasons. One, I myself have a bit of African blood in me (that’s where I get these excellent big, blowjob lips and my perfect, round ass!) and second, who doesn’t love a BBC! Any teen whore worth her salt has tried her damnedest to fuck and suck a big, heavy, black monster cock!
Hanukkah is observed for eight nights and days, starting on the 25th day of Kislev according to the Hebrew calendar. That being said, simply because it’s a religious holiday, that’s no excuse not to have some serious fucking fun after all the offspring and such have tucked away for the night. And if you need some inspiration, here, let me help you out, there!
Use your menorah to produce some romantic mood lighting. Since each night you add a candle, each night the lighting will change. (Porno photo-op, anyone?)
Always have sex before you make the latkes, trust me, just go with it.
Play strip spin the dreidel. The Hebrew letter Gimel means take off all your clothes, Shin means put your clothing back on, Hei means take off half of your clothing and Nun means do absolutely nothing. (Or fuck a nun, if you’re lucky enough to have one on hand)
Use some edible massage oil in bed to give your partner a massage. The oil probably won’t last for eight days, but it will still be good holiday fun.
Find a way to incorporate chocolate gelt into your sex life every day of the holiday. Chocolate is an alleged aphrodisiac, after all. And if it wasn’t fuck it, we need it anyway! I mean, It’s fucking chocolate!
Give your partner a gift each night. Not the kind you can buy, but the kind that makes them bite the pillow and pray the neighbors won’t need a smoke.
If you’re having sex for one, make sure to get some fantasy inspiration from any of my blogs. Even nice Jewish guys like my pics, and it’s great, cheap phone sex. Your mamma would be so proud!
Instead of smoking a after fucking cigarette (which I do not, in any way, encourage….. wait, yeah, I kind of do…), sneak some good, strong cannabis butter into your home made doughnuts and watch the family meal make a big turn around! (If you do that, I’m going to need pics, please?
And last, but not least, don’t use your cum to spike the punch, it doesn’t work out. I may, or may not, have tried this before.
On that note, my darlings, be safe, but more importantly, have fun and cum loads and loads for me! Better yet, do something sick and twisted, and tell me about it! I’m dying to hear about it!
